There’s this idea about love that when it comes along it should be perfect, flawless and that you should feel that they are the ones from the moment you see them. All the fairy tales that we watched when we were young made us believe that if it’s meant to be it will be and that when the right one comes along everything will fall into place.
This isn’t true. The right person never comes with the perfect package or the perfect circumstances. The right person might actually come along while you are too busy to notice, or maybe too picky to give it a shot, or you were too consumed with yourself and your future or with even the wrong person. You can’t rely on the idea that if it is meant to be, it will. You will have to go that extra mile to make sure it works.
This doesn’t mean you should be clingy, needy, and give up on your life, career and whatever you like; however, you should stop waiting for the right circumstances to come to begin the ideal relationship you have in your head. You should stop waiting for the feeling that everything will fall into place because it doesn’t happen that way. To put it simply, love isn’t always perfect.
Here are some myths about love you get from the movies that you should not apply to your own life:
1-The timing will be perfect
No one has a perfect time for falling in love because it usually happens unexpectedly. No one plans to fall in love so naturally people usually have other plans at the time. People keep on claiming that there’s such a thing called wrong timing. Well yes, maybe there is! But when you meet the right person then you should make the timing suit you. If it’s the right person then you should be willing to change your plans a little bit around and make them suit your relationship, and if they are the right person then they won’t want you to drop every single plan you had in mind for them anyway. They will help you to be better and make your dreams – be it career or other dreams – come true. However, you need to compromise a little bit.
2-When you fall in love with someone you don’t see their flaws
Some people believe that when you fall for someone you get blinded and you can’t see their flaws, that’s why you freak out when you actually notice the flaws later on. The truth is you can actually see someone’s flaws even when you love them so much, but the mature thing is about being able to accept them, handle them, and sometimes even love them. Finding a flaw or two in the person you believe is the right one isn’t a big deal as long as it’s not a major flaw that you count as a deal breaker. No one is perfect, but you should know which qualities are more important to you over others.
3-If it’s the right person you won’t have problems and arguments
Absolutely not! Having problems in your relationship is normal and actually healthy. How you handle your problems though is what really matters. Your communication together is what counts. You shouldn’t give up on a person because you have some problems or struggles.
4-When the right person comes along you’ll feel complete or happy
Sorry to be the one to break it to you, but no one is responsible for your happiness. If you’re happy with your life and yourself then you won’t need anyone to make you feel happy or content. Of course, being with someone that you love and loves you back will make you happier.
5-You should think alike or come from the same background
It’s always thought that the one you should be with has to have the same thoughts you have and should be raised up the same way you are or at least come from the same background and culture. This is a myth too. As long as you can deal with each other, they don’t have to be your carbon copy.
6-You shouldn’t be scared and shouldn’t experience doubts
One of the very common myths is that when the right person comes along you’ll feel it, know it and be certain about it. That is rarely the case because we’re complex creatures and any life decision in our lives is usually doubted at first. We need to think and analyze before we make any decision, so when it comes to the right person it’s healthy to be doubtful and scared, it doesn’t mean that they’re not the right one.