Written by: Lamis Eissa
Judge me while you thought it didn’t hurt me because I hid my tears
Judge me because you think it didn’t break me
Judge me because you think it didn’t make me restless
Judge me because I faked a smile when all I felt inside was emptiness
Judge meย because I wore makeup because it was the only thing that made me feel better about my broken self
Judge meย because I dyed my hair because I wanted to be unrecognizable to others
Judge me because I hopped across 8 countries to escape a reality so cruel I couldn’t face
Judge me because all I ever wanted to be was true to myself and to others
Judge me because I had the guts to stand up to myself
Judge me because I believed someone else deserved better
Judge me because I wanted that other someone to find what he truly deserves
Judge me because I knew that person wasn’t me
Judge me because all you ever saw were happy social media posts
Judge me because you never heard my screams or his
Judge me because you never heard the sounds of slammed doors and shattered plates
Judge me because I silently screamed wishing there was a way out
Judge me because your mother never cut you out for two months because you believed you deserved better
Judge me because you don’t know what it’s like to truly be alone
Judge me because you don’t know what it’s like to have every man (friend or not) think your vulnerability makes you easy
Judge me because I hope you never get to experience what I have been through
Judge me because I showed you otherwise
Judge me because of your judgement I have become impervious to pain
Judge me or not, watch me rise
Watch me rise from the ashes
Watch me breakthrough my pain
Watch me walk through your whispers
Watch me stride through your rumors
Watch me pretend not to cave to your gossip
Watch me deflect every stick- stone and bone you throw
Watch me become stronger, happier and truer to myself than I ever was
Watch me evolve into someone I never knew I could be
Watch me bring myself back
Watch me smile at your hate
Watch me laugh from the heart
Watch me make new friends
Watch me go on adventures
Watch me watching you judge me. Because of your judgement I have truly learned how to grow
Yours truly,
A divorced woman in Egypt