Divorce used to be a word that traumatized families and friends; now it has become too shockingly familiar and common.  We often hear of a ‘fairytale’couple who were madly in love but soon got a divorce.

Divorce rates rose dramatically since the times of our parents’ generation as divorce seems to be growing increasingly popular by the day. In the past, couples usually got divorced after they’ve tried long and hard enough to save their marriage; they wouldn’t easily let go. Nowadays, people give up on their family much quicker than in the old days.

After interviewing many people, I’ve come up with a number of different reasons behind the rise of this disturbing phenomenon. I’m mostly focusing on the problems of the upper and middle classes. There will probably be more different causes if we were to study the lower classes; usually more than one reason leads to divorce.

 By no means are we trying to be pessimistic during the wedding season; the sole purpose of this article is to highlight and share the reasons for divorce with the newlyweds so they can hopefully try to avoid them.

  • Financial Pressure & Materialism

For as long as Egyptian girls shall live under their parents’ roofs, their dad is usually the one who financially supports them until they get married. Their future husbands then take on that role, particularly if they are not working. Sometimes, women have a lot of financial requirements that aren’t met by their husbands. This often results in continuous disagreement between couples, leading husbands to believe that their wives are unappreciative.

Sometimes couples have different spending styles; one of them is more extravagant and the other more greedy or stingy and that also creates a lot of struggles.

Life has become extremely expensive; from housing, daily expenses, to kids’ schooling. This financial burden is the source of countless arguments. Whether the wife is a working woman and contributes financially or not, she still expects a lot of things which aren’t necessarily met. This one of the main reasons for divorce.

  • Expectations Followed By Dissapointments

Movies and TV series have always depicted marriage as “the happy ever after tale for each and every love story”. Parents teach their daughters  that marriage is the ultimate life goal; girls grow up thinking that once they reach it they should feel accomplished. That’s exactly when all of their expectations hit rock bottom.

Many individuals expect that marriage is going to be their source of freedom, happiness or satisfaction; they expect it to be an easy ride. No one prepares them for marriage’s compromises and sacrifice, that it’s not always ‘a walk in the park’. Partners should be stand up to each other and for each other to hold on and make it work. Another reason for disappointment is not knowing your partner well enough before marriage.

  • Not Knowing Your Partner Well

Or that you were in such a rush to actually choose the wrong person. Sometimes, “love is blind” is a true statement but other times people choose to be intentionally blind because they can’t stand the idea of breaking up. Others convince themselves that their partners will change to the better after marriage or that their flaws will eventually vanish with time and that’s rarely the case.

You have to get to know your partner very well before marriage; spend more time together talking and discussing general as well as personal matters. You shouldn’t get carried, swept or blown away with love; you should get to know their true self.

If you noticed an annoying flaw, talk it through with them and see what they have to say about it. If they don’t change and it still bothers you, don’t be intimidated to postpone the wedding. If you still think you can’t live with it, break up because it usually magnifies after you live under one roof. Of course, I’m not referring to superficial flaws; we’re all full of them. I’m talking about more major ones.

  • Getting Married For the Wrong reasons

One should only get married when they’re in deeply love and wish to share the rest of their life with their partner, not to satisfy their parents or society, have kids or seek freedom. Check the reasons that you shoudn’t get married for.

  • Parental Interference 

In-laws are sometimes the reason behind the failure of some marriages. It all starts when one of the partners storms out to their parents who usually react in exaggeration because they love us dearly and unconsciously take our side. The problem which could have been easily resolved between the couple is now inflated. Try solving your own problems together without involving anyone else.

  • Women have become more independent

In the past, women were mostly dependant on men. They used to put up with so many things they didn’t like about their husbands because they were helpless and financially dependant. Now, women are more independent, educated and aware of their rights. When they feel the need to walk out of the marriage, they just leave. Women can now file for divorce in court, aka “Khol3”. Sometimes, women feel too powerful and misuse their independence and freedom. Career-oriented women sometimes find it hard to reach a reasonable work-life balance, neglecting their homes and families. Unless, of course, they’re the sole providers for their families and don’t have any other choice.

  • People Change After Marriage

Girls become nagging demanding wives; husbands start getting edgy with the tiniest and silliest of things. Both of them stop looking after themselves;  getting heavier by the year. Couples start taking each other for granted and stop trying to compromise for each other. They ignore important stuff like making time for each other and going out together. They simply stop tolerating each other.

  • Lack of communication or communication problems

Communication is the key to the success of any relationship. Couples shouldn’t interrupt each other, shout or avoid conversations; they shouldn’t feel  embarrassed to discuss anything. That’s how they discover each other more and find out how each of them views the relationship. If communication fails in any way, there’s a great chance that the relationship will fail too.

  • Different social backgrounds

When couples stem from different social and economic backgrounds, they usually have different priorities, hold different beliefs and lead different lifestyles.

  • Drug addiction

Unfortunately, that specific reason has become very common!! You get married to someone not knowing they’re on coke or any other type of drugs and soon get divorced. This could be avoided if you spent enough time knowing your partner before getting married.

  • Social Media

It complicates relationships in so many ways because it ironically facilitates many things. It makes cheating easier because people can easily connect; it makes people compare their lives to others and feel dissatisfied. Couples only post and share their happy moments so others falsely believe that their life is perfect and problem free.

  • Loss of Intimacy

Whether the reason is that one or both partners have become too busy, lost interest or changed for any reason, lack of intimacy is a huge  problem for married couples. Unmet needs have to be carefully communicated between partners; they should seek professional help if they have a serious problem.

  • Cheating

Cheating has become very common, not only for men but for women too!! Cheating does not only mean having sex outside the marriage. Flirting with someone other than your wife/husband is cheating, thinking about someone other than your wife/husband is considered cheating and falling in love with someone else is definitely cheating. Principles have evolved; people take cheating much more lightly and that’s a major reason for divorce.

  • Abuse

Physical or verbal abuse is usually a very common cause for divorce, even if one of the patrners tolerated it for some time. It should never even be an option in any relationship.

  • Lack of Respect and Trust

Respecting your partner means you should be honest with them; you shouldn’t do anything behind their backs, lie to them or cheat on them. Mutual trust and respect is crucial for the stability of any relationship; once lost, they can never be restored.

  • Lack of Responsibility, Maturity and Compromise

Being responsible is the essence of marriage so is learning to give up on things and compromise for each other. It requires a great deal of maturity to be able to handle the many responsibilities of married life. Being spoiled or selfish is sometimes the reason behind broken families; always putting your needs first isn’t what marriage is all about.