By Mostafa Hesham Fawzy

At times, life just hits us with the weirdest situations and the most random unexpected events .It usually leaves us feeling clueless how to react or even plan to react in the first Place. Things like your debit card not functioning, or the traffic being awful on a day you want to make it somewhere quickly, or your favorite garment 3and el makwagy on a day you want to wear it.

So for today, here is a hack to an unexpected situation you might deal with on a rough (and very bizarre) day. You can never know how to deal with every situation you might face, but now after reading this you can know how to handle at least one of them. We all have our own List of situations to which we feel totally clueless and reluctant. Today is all about facing at least one of them…So if you’re ever stuck in a room with a Kangaroo…Here is what you have to do to ace the situation!

1. It’s 2015… You probably have a cell phone. CALL ANYONE!

Survival Mode…Survival Mode. If life is not against you and your phone is not dead, take it out and dial anyone you find on your contacts and ask for help… Just make sure you don’t call your ex!

 2.Be the next Tom Cruise and take a window exit.

Tom Cruise can do it.. So can you! I am not yet sure if you’ll end up like Tom Cruise. What do you have to lose though? I would recommend you take the kangaroo with you. You’re not dying alone!

point 7-Kangaroo

  1. What if you try to learn the sounds and moves of a kangaroo, and be a kangaroo as well.

You will need glue, a fake pouch, and a kangaroo-like teddy bear. And then you are mama kangaroo. If you practice this technique in advance, make sure you rehearse alone; we don’t want your parents thinking of you as a kangaroo… matgebolnash elkalam!

point 3-kangaroo

4. Do not panic, try to remain silent and imitate any item inside the room. E3mel nafsak mayet.

Panicking and screaming would make the kangaroo act all crazy and attack you. So what if you were a vase or a table? Would the kangaroo even notice you? You will need to stand still and get creative with your moves.

kanagroo-oint one

5. Imitate something bigger, like a dinosaur. Who would win the battle then?

Tala3 kol Godzilla w Jurassic Park el gowak. You will need your King Kong moves and loud voice. Try to avoid eye contact while doing so, we don’t want you to panic and have the kangaroo mistake you for am angry chicken… Ouch!

6. Support yourself with all the bulky things in the room, become circular as much as you can.

If the kangaroo becomes aggressive and punches you, try to make yourself something that bounces. Support yourself with pillows and stuff, leave the kangaroo totally clueless towards his tactics of defense. You learned Physics, the Kangaroo didn’t….#likeaboss.

7. Meditate.

So let’s face it… You are in the same room with a kangaroo, so maybe your best option is to get out of the room mentally through mediation. Make sure bas enak teshrab chay Ming el seeni ablaha.

kangaroo-point 5

 

8. Law maak ay bomb, sawareekh, wala3a…. Put it in the Kangaroo’s pouch and take cover.

We have all grown up to be the disastrous evil kids we are, so make the best out of it. Take a corner, prepare your weapons, wait for the perfect moment, maybe the kangaroo’s afternoon nap… And BOOM!

If none of this works out, you can try talking to the kangaroo about all the issues bothering you, and maybe the kangaroo will be the one longing to break the door of the room down and solve the problem for you. To sum up, by now you should be feeling so lucky to be facing much less stressful situations than that one. Anyway, if you have ever been faced with a kangaroo situation, please make sure you give us a hint about the experience and the credibility of the tactics. And as usual make sure you enjoy it and give the kangaroo a name… Haga zay badawy aw sultan.