By Sama El Feky
Everyone stalks online! You can try to deny it all you want but no one will really believe it. Social outlets have made it incredibly easy to know everything you need to know about a person without even meeting them. Although online stalking can be very useful and informative, mind you, it can put you in the most awkward situations ever if you actually get caught. Once you get over the embarrassment, It will certainly take some effort on your part to avoid looking like a creep. Yucks!
Here is a list of what people usually do when they get caught stalking someone on social media:
1- Delete The Account
It might be the fastest solution, but it would make it so obvious that you freaked out and deleted your account. It is basically a chickenshit move, but in the moment it seems like the best option you have!
2- Change The Name
Chances are the poor victim might have already saw your name stalker so this is one weak solution. Putting that much effort into hiding what you did might just backfire. Play it cool!
3- Do Not Unlike Anything
DO NOT EVER like and unlike, like and unlike. That is the worst move you can ever do. Why you ask? Well… Because it makes you look like a paranoid creep and you do not want that. No one wants to be seen as a creep!
4- Add the person
There are very few people who would use that solution and it is actually not a bad one. It might be a little straight forward but at least it gives you an excuse as to why you were on that person’s profile in the first place. You would totally appear fierce and confident so props to you people!
5- Avoid Talking To The Person
Awkward. Awkward. Awkwaaard. Only awkward people who can’t deal with awkwardness would act this awkward. Do not under any circumstances avoid talking to the person you stalked, you would just make your stalking seem like a big deal. It isn’t if you really think about it. It would only seem like a big deal if you made a big deal out of it.
6- You Stalked For A Reason
This solution might actually be your best shot. Coming up with a good excuse as to why you were snooping around on a certain profile can be easier than you think. Maybe take a screenshot of the picture you accidentally liked and send it to the person you were stalking as if to ask them something about it. They can never really know you were snooping around for no reason!
7- The I Don’t Remember Card
Everyone’s favorite card! The less you say the better! “Oh, I don’t remember. I totally ‘sleepstalk’!”
8- Use Your Sibling
Blaming the unknown always works! What are the chances of the person you stalked to really ever talking to your sibling? Close to zero, probably! So maybe they will believe you when you say your annoying little sister was on your account and liking everything on everyone’s page.
9-The You Got Hacked excuse
That solution never gets old. The thing about lying is that it is never a lie until proven otherwise. This white lie would not just take you off the hook but it would also make you look like a victim. Yay! You would have to do it right though because it can easily backfire.
10- Get Over It
Some people just play it super chill. Either they put up their best poker face “yeah, whatever,” or they simply admit what they did. “I totally stalked you… So?”
There should seriously be an understanding now between everyone that yes we all stalk and yes some person might have liked your picture from 80 weeks ago…so what? Unfortunately though, we are egotistical narcissistic creatures that just love to complain about someone stalking us to feel awesome when really we do the same thing in secret.