Something we all agree on is that relationships are in fact very HARD. They require a tremendous amount of effort. But when it’s with the right person, it’s totally worth it, right? What if it is not the right person, though? How can you tell? What are the red flags that should make you give up and walk away?

A very common one is when he starts to get too possessive of you. That’s when alarms should start going off in your head.

But how can you know?

Here are the 5 signs that will tell you if he’s being too possessive or just extra loving.

1. When he demands you ask for his permission


Have you asked me first? That’s a very common question between possessive partners. They are usually too involved in every aspect of your life and demand being notified before every step you take. And when you don’t, they make your life a living hell. If that sounds familiar, I am sorry to tell you, he is possessive.

2. When everyone makes him jealous


If he hates your male friends, makes you feel guilty for spending time with them, criticizes your male coworkers for being “too friendly”, and demands to know about every interaction between you and any other male; then he is obsessively jealous and it is not going away.

We are sorry!  

3. When he undermines your career every chance he gets


Possessive men want to feel like they are in a position of power. So they feel threatened and insecure by empowered women with promising careers. Therefore, if he is possessive, he will take every chance he gets to undermine the importance of your work and make you feel like you are wasting your time. He is probably even a very firm yet secret believer of the whole “women belong in the kitchen” thing. So if you are not planning to wait on his every need for the rest of your life, we suggest you run far and run fast.

4. When he calls it ‘love’


Here is the thing; sometimes possessive men don’t know they are possessive. Therefore after they make your life miserable, they come and sincerely apologize justifying their behavior by calling it, love. Which in their minds, it is. So sympathize, but not too much.

5. When he tries to be your whole world, like literally


Possessiveness often comes from fear; fear of abandonment, fear of being alone, fear of losing. The point is that they are terrified and acting out of fear, and no amount of rational thinking or conversation will take that fear away. In his mind, the only thing that can is for him to be everything and everyone in your life. This is the only way he will be sure you won’t leave him because you have nowhere else to go.

Romantic, right?

If you are struggling with these signs, then it is time you had a very serious talk with your significant other. If it doesn’t go well, don’t despair, there’s plenty of fish in the sea.