Anyone who has been to Cairo for even one millisecond knows that it is an insanely chaotic place. Somehow the people who live here have adapted in a way to handle the craziness, but it is such a big place there are still some places that confuse the heck out of us. Here’s looking at you, Maadi.
Maadi – The labyrinth of roundabouts and flower shops
Speaking of Maadi, anyone who is not from there knows the pain of getting lost in the never-ending winding streets. And you can forget about asking for directions, because as soon as someone uses a roundabout and flower shop as a landmark, it’s over. You might as well pull over and move into the nearest empty apartment because you’re never getting out. Do you think Maadi people never leave because they have everything they need there, or is it really because they just can’t find their way out?
Mall of Arabia – The track you never wear the right shoes for
At least you know you can skip the gym any time you go shopping at Mall of Arabia, because you are going to burn so many calories looping around and around looking for that one shop, you might just be able to fit in the next size down of that dress you want by the time you get there. Does anyone really know what stores are in there anyway?
Shar3 el Thowra – Because one is apparently not enough
That’s one street you have to triple check with your friends that you are talking about the right one. We all know it is no laughing matter if one of you ends up in Tagamo3, the other in Maadi, and another in Mohandeseen. You might as well cancel because your plans are already screwed. Thank you Cairo traffic.
Zamalak – Just meet me at Oum Kalthoum, again
It might sound silly for people who are from there, but Zamalek is ridiculously confusing once you leave the safety of the Corniche and 26th of July. It’s like venturing into the interior of the island with its confusingly winding streets is an adventure that won’t leave you the same. How do they fit so many boutiques and embassies on one little island?! It’s just always safer to meet at Oum Kalthoum and have a native guide you.
Mogamma – We’d rather walk through hell….
Mogamma might not be that confusing if it wasn’t overflowing with stampedes of people trying to get their s*%# done. But it is, which makes it quite difficult to navigate. On top of that, we are not even sure if the not-to-be-motivated-by-anything employees who work there know where everything really is.
Garden City – The neighborhood built to mess with your head
Garden City, while not that large, was built specifically to #*!$ with your head. The city planning was designed to be winding, quiet, tree-lined, and upscale. That translates to “it doesn’t make any sense when you actually want to find something inside.” What happened to rows of streets that all connect to each other in a logical way?
And finally, can we say Maadi again?…
