When we screw up in a relationship we always blame it on love. They didn’t love us enough…we couldn’t love them back…love vanished…love is stupid…love is hard… Yep, love is always the bad guy! But that is not entirely true. Love is the easiest part in any relationship! It’s not even a choice, it’s an irrational chain of feelings that simply cannot be stopped. Falling in love is the easiest part here, but staying in love, that’s the tricky one. Love comes with a gang, and each member of this gang must secure its own place in your relationships, else love won’t survive or be enough. So let’s meet the members of the gang…
Member #1 Partnership (a.k.a Being Buddies)
It’s not the lack of love that makes unhappy relationships, it’s the lack of friendship. This member disagrees with the fact that lovers can’t be friends! If you and your partner aren’t buddies, can’t put all the romantic stuff aside and just be two fools who enjoy each other’s companies, then when boredom hits, love won’t be able to pull up your relationship on its own!
Member #2 Acceptance (a.k.a No Judgment)
This member knows that everyone wants to have their partner customized to their own preference! But simply that is neither possible, nor a sign of love. So the role of this member is to teach us to accept the imperfections, flaws, craziness, bad habits…of the person we love in order to keep them without judging them.
Member #3 Being Like Minded (a.k.a Chemistry)
It is good to fall in love with someone who has different interests than you. But that doesn’t mean you should have zero common interests! Your minds must click. The spark is crucial. There must be things you’re both mutually passionate about, else it will be like speaking two different languages! This member’s absence is a deal breaker!
Member #4 Independence (a.k.a Your Sense of Self)
The lone wolf member who seeks partners having some time apart. This member balances the relationship, because it proves that you and your partner are good together, but you’re good on your own too. It helps not place pressure on a relationship, keeps it fresh and allows you both to keep growing, together and on your own.
Member #5 Forgiveness (a.k.a Nobody is Perfect)
That one member who roots for not keeping score in a relationship. Who thinks mistakes happen, we all are flawed, no need for holding grudges, or blaming and pointing fingers! Without this member the relationship will soon be filled with bitterness, fights and no love can survive that!
Member #6 Support (a.k.a Being on The Same Team)
This member is secretly a cheerleader! Its role is to make sure that the two persons in the relationship have each other’s back, give strength to each other, and both know it’s alright that their partner’s attention can sometimes shift away from them if they have a major task, event…This member’s absence can be fatal to any relationship.
Member #7 Trust (a.k.a Freedom)
The member who hates chains and restrictions and believes in having faith in each other. Who feeds on confidence and breathes communication. This member saves relationships the trouble of jealousy, or trying to control your partner. If trust wasn’t there, love will go out of the window sooner or later.
Love is crucial but it’s bound to get overshadowed with other stuff, so make sure the foundation of your relationship is strong, that’s how it can survive.