Every couple argues, but these words will turn a spat into an all-out-war. Some things are really better left unsaid.
โWe need to talkโ
If you do need to talk, it should be, โCan we talk?โ Itโs an invitation to discuss, not a declaration of war.
โYouโre just like your father/motherโ
When you say this, you are probably talking about your father-in-lawโs bad traits, rather than his good qualities. Besides not seeing your partner for who he really is, this type of statement will immediately make him take on the defensive.
โIโm not upsetโ
Really? If you are not upset, then why are you making snappy remarks, slamming the door, putting your partner down and pretending that he does not exist? Itโs better to talk about whatโs bothering you and try to control your emotions.
โItโs all your fault!โ
Come on! We all know itโs rarely one partnerโs fault in a relationship. Itโs not fair to put all the blame on them; recognize your own faults and mistakes as well.ย
โEveryone warned me about youโ
Then why are you dating them? If you chose to neglect all the bad comments your friends and family said about your partner, then itโs all on you now. Youโre the only one to blame.
โYou did the same thing last timeโ
Little fights and arguments become big ones when we bring them up over and over again. Let go of all your previous fights and concentrate on the present and the future.ย
โYou alwaysโฆโย
This is a very selfish thing to say. You want to have them understand how the pattern of what they do or say impacts you and the relationship so that together you can change it.
