broken

At some point inĀ life, most of usĀ have been through a painful heartbreak which can beĀ one of the most difficultĀ experiences one could ever go through. They’re likeĀ a strong punch to your heart, feelings and sometimes dignity. They leave us with bleeding hearts, broken souls, and a lot of trust issues that suck the happiness out of our lives and the lives of those who care for us for long periods of time until we are finally able to move on and let go.

 


“I’ve had my heart broken, and it’s the hardest thing. Everyone says, ‘Give it time, you’ll feel better in the morning.’ But you don’t. You feel like it’s never, ever going to heal – especially during the first few weeks.”
ā€• Mollie King


 

That is why when one chooses to love again after such a bad experience, the decision usually involves a lot of struggles and self-doubt, whether one is able to go through all of this again or not. Especially when it comes to women and especially in our society, it requires a huge amount of bravery onĀ her part to be able to get over her doubts and start all overĀ again. That’s why her partner should feel lucky, be patient and understanding and know that this journey will be totally worth it. In the journey of being in love with a broken person, a partner must know that he might face the following…ā€¦

Doubts

At the beginning of any relationship, there are always doubts: doubts if you made the right choice, doubts if you’re moving too fast, doubts whether this is what you really want right nowā€¦ all of these doubts are normal in any relationship. When the relationship involves two broken partners (or at least one), the doubts will increase. ManyĀ things will be doubted: the intentions, the words if you really mean it, how serious the relationship is, and many other things. It doesn’t have anything to do with any of you; it’s just the scars that need time to heal.

Trust

Trust problems are a common trait with broken men. After losing trust once, they have a huge problem placing it back in someoneā€™s hands once again. When men get heart broken, they feel their dignity is hurt. That is why it’s usually hard for them to open up to other women the same way they did before; they may open up but they will try to be very careful to how much they revealĀ to the new partner. Anything the partner does will instantly relate to a previous relationship where it ended badly and this will pain him and may even cause him to pick up fights over very trivial mattersĀ that don’t make any sense.

Ghosts of the Past

Ghosts of past relationships will haunt you both for a while, so donā€™t be surprised. From time to time, a mention of the past girlfriend or boyfriend will pop up. Although it is not the healthiest thing to bring up, but still one should be understanding that pain still exists and that you partner needs to let it out. Who better can she talk to if it isnā€™t you?

 


ā€œi felt her absence. it was like waking up one day with no teeth in your mouth. you wouldn’t need to run to the mirror to know they were goneā€
ā€• James Dashner, The Scorch Trials


 

If you find yourself in a relationship like this, there are three things you need toĀ do:

First: You have to set your pace on the slowest forĀ both of you. If one wants to take it slowly, the other should definitely comply so that a partner would not feel uncomfortable with where the relationship is going.

Second: You HAVE to be there no matter how distant your partner seems. There will be times of doubt; there will be times of tension and pointless fights. You will have doubts, but always remember why you started in the first place. Never forget that, and do not ever let these doubts get to you. You will be OK.

Third: You should definitely feel special, whether the broken partner is the man or the woman or both. They were hurt and yet they chose to be with you during theirĀ times of struggle and pain and pickedĀ you over their fears; you should definitely respect that. Take it step by step together until you reach safety.