Once you reach your mid-twenties, you might witnessย many of your friends gettingย engaged orย married while youโre just sitting there watching it all happen. Personally, I donโt wish to get married any time soon; Iโm really happy being single. But lately, I started to wonder if I will ever get married. Why were my friends more successful inย finding ‘the one’? Will I ever find him? What if I found him and didnโt even realise it was really him?
I decided to ask my friends what made them believeย they’ve finallyย metย ‘the one’.ย Their unanimous answer, โI felt I was ready to commitโ, got me thinking. Are theyย married to ‘the one’ because he is the one, or did theyย just want to commit? Does ‘the one’ even exist?
Whoโs ‘The One’?
โThe oneโ is supposed to be your soul mate, that special someone in your life who makes you feel special too. They complete you! Growing up watching too many Disney movies, we automatically dreamย of our own fairytale; we wait forย a handsome princeย to come save us from our misery.
Isnโt every boyfriend ‘The One’?
Letโs be realistic; you think every boyfriend or random crush is ‘the one’. You fall in love and convince yourself that it’s for real this time. You find him special, you feel he completes you, and you wish to spend the rest of your life with him.
So whoโs ‘The One’?
Itโs simple; he doesnโt exist โ a myth. Weโre all waiting for someone who doesnโt exist.
Then who am I going to commit to?
Commitment isnโt about who youโre involved with; you simply want it or you donโt. The decisionย to commit and start a family will usually comeย from you and not anyone else. The menย might make the idea of commitment seem more appealing to you and change your mind about it, but they themselves wonโt be the reason for it.
What makes women commit?
Most women are hypergamy (marrying someone from a higher class) by nature. When/ifย theyย land someoneย from a higher socio economic background, theyย automatically think of commitment. That doesnโt mean women areย gold-diggers; they’re just afterย the person who they believe would make a good father for their children. A woman will think she found her lifetimeย soul mate when she only found a current soul mate.
What about men?
Men might fall in love with more than one woman. When it comes to commitment, it might be the same.ย Polygamy is socially accepted in Egypt; rather than finding ‘the one’, they could find up to 4 ‘ones’!!
Then what am I waiting for?
Youโre waiting for nothing! Many girls keep obsessing over โfinding the oneโ and lose chances with eligibleย potential partners. Not saying you should settle for less, but at least give them a chance. ‘The one’ wonโt come in a shining armor; youโre onlyย chasing ghosts.
You need to reevaluate yourself and look at the big picture. Chances are youโll never recogniseย ‘the one’ because they donโt even exist. When you truly want to commit, youโll doย it. Real life is nothing like “How I met your mother” series; don’t become a Ted waiting for years to find the right one. Eventually, Ted and Robin end up together when they’re both ready for commitment; they were each other’s ‘one’ all along.
