Dear ‘not-so secret’ diary,
I’ve been trying to do an internet cleanse. I’m avoiding all social media outlets these past couple of weeks. Not because I’m feeling like it’s becoming an addiction and affecting my mental health and all that crap. But lately, I’ve been getting kind of sick and tired with how obsessed people have become with relationships and plastering it all over the Internet. Every time I go on Facebook, I see ‘I don’t know who’ just got engaged to their high school sweetheart. I go on Instagram and find my friend’s honeymoon pictures in the Bahamas. I go on Snapchat and see a group of my friends out on a dinner double date.
At this point, I just wanna throw my phone across the room. I mean I’m happy for them and everything but it’s getting a bit ridiculous. You’re way way too young to be thinking about kids when you’re still a kid yourself. I know I know, love has nothing to do with age and all that, but if you’re genuinely happy and engaged in your relationship, you wouldn’t feel the need to post about it every second of everyday. What are you trying to prove or achieve? Also, have some sympathy for the rest of us who are only starting to figure out what this thing called “love” is all about and actually just living our age.
I know how people are gonna react to this, “omg you’re so jealous, omg you’re so bitter.” Well, maybe I am, but it’s not like I’ve always been single and I’m lonely and sh*t. Quite the opposite actually, I’ve had my fair share of relationships. Unfortunately, they didn’t quite turn out how I expected BUT they did turn into valuable life lessons. Yes yes, I sound so cliché, but it’s true. Now I know what to avoid and what to look out for. I can easily spot the assholes and the fuckboys from a mile away. I know for example that long distance relationships are not for me. I know that if someone wants me in their life they should do whatever it takes to keep me.
These girls getting married in their early 20s have barely had any life experience. You’re honestly wasting your youth. These are the best years of your life when you should be out there mingling and having fun and growing. How do you know you won’t change your mind about this person in a couple of years from now? Your 20s is the time when you change your mind and grow the most. How do you know that this serious relationship or marriage is the right one for you, or will be 30 years down the road, when you have nothing to compare it to? What are you gonna teach your children about life when you barely learnt enough for yourself? This whole idea of locking someone down at a young age so you’re “safe” from becoming that old cat lady is ridiculous to be honest.
What happened to romance? What happened to love finding you when it’s meant to find you? What happened to the idea of fate? Finding a guy that fits your social standards and hunting him down until you lock him down is exactly why romance is dead in our generation.
So yes I am single, yes I might come off as bitter and yes I might repeat the same mistake of getting attached to guys who are not worthy, but I don’t care. I’m growing and learning from my mistakes. Girls need to chill and stop thinking about marriage and love so obsessively as if they’re running out of time. The only thing you should be worrying about is what career you want to pursue or where you want to travel this summer or what you’re having for dinner tonight. Just relax, love will find you when it’s the right time. Focus on yourself and your happiness because you need to love yourself first before anyone can love you.
Signed,
A bitter 21 year old
