Summer is that time of the year where you are allowed to escape the life you have and run away on a vacation. Whether you decide to take a trip in Egypt, or hop on a plane and visit another country, you get almost the same disconnection from reality.
Now if you are a single person going on a trip, chances of meeting someone you feel like is “the one” are high. Sounds like a good thing? In reality, it is bad, and can get ugly.
Flings have been around for ages. They are, basically, short-term relationships, where both parties are aware of its short durations. Destination relationships, however, is a term created by frequent travellers, and popularized by travel bloggers who are always on the go.
The term is very self-explanatory, which means having a relationship during your stay in a certain destination through your travels.
A fling in a foreign destination, what could possibly go wrong?
While in some cases, destination relationships might work, we can all agree that the majority of them are doomed. Dating is already hard as it is; sustaining a relationship with someone you barely know during a vacation is, most of the time, unrealistic.
Even the way most people deal with both flings and destination relationships are unlike other relationships.
With that said, people still go for it, and some even seek them, knowing it will end in heartbreak. Then why do people still go for them?
Everything has its pros and cons. In this situation, however, most of the pros and the cons are the same. Whether you think it is worth it or not, it is a matter of perception. Are the pros going to outweigh the cons? This is up for you to decide.
You do not experience anything outside of the honeymoon phase
The honeymoon phase is a part of any relationship. It ends with the first big argument. That is when you know the real person you are with, and start adjusting to dealing with each other. Many relationships end right after the honeymoon phase, but those who get past it usually start a real and meaningful relationship.
Now when it comes to destination relationships, the whole fling is a honeymoon phase – literally and figuratively. Whether both parties are travelling, or a solo traveller gets involved with a resident, it leads to the same results. Someone is experiencing something new, and the other person is being influenced by this.
While some might think it is healthy, due to the fact that you develop emotions fast in a healthy environment, which leads to you being more patient after the honeymoon phase, others might disagree. The reasons for disagreeing all lead to the fact that you do not get the time to know the real person, and subsequently, you cannot sustain a true relationship. This leads to the next point.
The fast hellos and goodbyes
Frequent travellers are used to this; saying your goodbyes just a few days after the hello. When you say this hello, you are sure that you are saying your goodbye soon, hence, why destination relationships are always intense!
You are in the moment, and not worried about the future. You are focused on enjoying each other during the short amount of time – whether it’s a couple of days, weeks, months, and sometimes being just a few hours.
The major pro is that you kill off the mind games, since no one has time for it. The major con is that you do not get enough time to know who they really are. You are in an intense relationship with someone you barely know.
You are never your true self while travelling
No matter how much you try, you will always be someone else who exists just temporarily during the vacation. You do not have any life stresses, you are discovering a new place, you are outside of your regular routine, and more importantly, you do NOT have any commitments.
By not being yourself, it does not affect just you, but the person you are building the “fling” with. For them, you are the adventurous person who is full of life and plans and who does not like that?
The future is uncertain
No matter how much you prepare yourself mentally for a fling, it is still a huge risk since you never really have control over your feelings.
If you are in a foreign destination, or the partner is visiting, chances are, you might not be able to ever see them again. But even if you are in the same country, and met in another city, it’s never guaranteed that your lives in the real world are compatible.