All new moms lose their senses over the contradictions they either read in books, watch on television, or hear from their doctors. One thing is for sure though, once they deliver that baby and despite how many books they read and how many doctors they visit, they find out they know almost nothing.
1. Expert Advice: Put your baby to bed drowsy but not asleep
Actual Reality:Â Rock, bounce, nurse, sing, then gennnnntly place your baby in the crib, where he will immediately spring to action and start bawling!
2. Expert Advice: Feed your child a varied diet.
Actual Reality: Feed your child whatever he’ll not gag back up.
3. Expert Advice:Â Take time for yourself.
Actual Reality:Â HAHAHAHA – NO WAY!
4. Expert Advice:Â Don’t let your child sleep in your bed.
Actual Reality: You’ll probably sleep first, so you don’t have much of a choice.
5. Expert Advice:Â Gently burp baby after meals.
Actual Reality: Then go change your shirt.. AGAIN!
6. Expert Advice:Â Let your toddler help you with simple tasks.
Actual Reality:Â Resist the urge to scream “OMG FORGET IT!”
7. Expert Advice:Â Forget about housework for a few months.
Actual Reality:Â Forget about housework, period.
8. Expert Advice:Â Use bath time as an opportunity to bond.
Actual Reality:Â How do you feel about sopping wet pants?
9. Expert Advice:Â Let your baby go diaperless if he develops a rash.
Actual Reality:Â Let your baby go diaperless and you’ll have bigger problems than a rash!
10. Expert Advice:Â Avoid tantrums by giving toddlers choices.
Actual Reality: Avoid tantrums by hiding in outer space.
