Ever since I was born, I have been living in a world that incoherently belonged to man, and trying to fit into his mold has never been this hard. But when this man turned out to be the biggest spoiled brat the world has ever conceived I stopped believing in anything other than gender equality.
I understand that women love to spoil their sons, and this is natural since women are nurturers by nature as much as men love to be nurtured, but the real question is when to say “Enough is enough?”. When everything is handed over at the slightest shed of tears, and when he feels that he is the centre of the known world, this is when the assurance of the suffering of another woman in 30 years time will take place. You see when a mother hands the world to her son through all his years from youth to adulthood on a silver platter, he will be looking for a woman who can, not only replace his mother, but also be able to deliver as much as she did if not even more.
Women can easily fall in the lap of an absolute brat, and this can easily happen if you let down all your guards and get sucked in before getting to really know him on his own, as well as amongst his family. When love is still blossoming it can be very hard to detect the faults in your man, give yourself the chance to know if this is really what you want, give yourself enough time to get to know his worst sides and do not rush into marrying him just for the sake of it feeling right the first couple of years. At the end of the day it is totally in your hands to change this unbearable case. Communication is the key, so speak out your mind, thoughts and don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself even if you will lose him. Only a true honorable man will hold on through thick and thin.
A relationship, marriage or anything that takes two to tango should be based on compromise and absolute appreciation. So if I’m late at preparing dinner for whatever reason I have valid or not, don’t get all mucho on me and demand that these are the basic things you expect of me. Maybe I’m tired or not so much in the mood to be performing my duties as a house wife, you should be a man enough to cater to yourself if my batteries go flat for the day. I would love to see you bring me breakfast in bed on a Friday morning, because believe me I will be doing the same on Saturday. And I would also love to see you take the kids to practice while I go and have lunch with my girlfriends; you see the soccer match can easily be replayed, but you and I definitely don’t have a rewind button.
Why don’t you wash the dishes if I prepared the meal? Why don’t you fold the laundry if I washed it? And more importantly why don’t you sit at home with the kids while I run my errands if errands where just the case? These are the simple day to day duties a woman face in our culture without moral support from her man who lived all his life being treated in a fashion equaling the si-sayed treatment. Don’t get me wrong Mr. Male, but there are things in life better than sitting on the couch flicking through the channels, and there are some kind of manners in hanging your clothes when you come home from work instead of making a trail from the door to the bedroom where you expect me to pick up after you. No, my love! You want to live in a pigsty I will walk out the door before you even know it.
Romance plays a major factor here, and I can totally understand that a woman may neglect her man at the birth of their first child, but when you see me drifting away why don’t you plan a surprise holiday where we can send the child to your mother’s or mine?, Or even better still, share with me the attention I give to our child and lets make it a team game that you and I can enjoy together. I will never be perfect, and neither will you, but if you can, please stop me when I start wandering away, pull me a little bit closer instead of searching for a new form of comfort in another woman, at the end of the day our beginning was as blooming as it will be with your muse.
My lady, share your chores and make it something sacred in your relationship. Look after yourself physically so he doesn’t have a reason to go astray or point a finger at you. And more importantly learn to fall in love with yourself, because if you don’t, NO MAN will ever love you, and this may lead to selling yourself short. Another thing that you need to really take care of is NOT to allow emotionally embittered women to influence you concerning the male gender. If you do, their hatred and unforgiveness will become yours. Soon you will find yourself suspicious, resentful and angry at all men.
At the end of the day a relationship between any two people is like the rope pulling game, you either pull too hard until the rope snaps which will leave you both on the floor, or you learn to let go just a little enough for you two to stand still on the ground.