Walking on the streets of Egypt can be a real struggle sometimes – Looking both ways while crossing a one way street, uncovered manholes, bikes one the pavements, broken streets, and more importantly, annoying human beings everywhere. Now, imagine all these problems when you’re walking your dog! Oh, no, no, no, no! Sh*t gets annoying!
Your dog literally has no idea where to walk
You’re used to maneuvering your way around the streets, and using your non-existent acrobatic skills. Your dog doesn’t, and they’re always confused when they’re walking. Assuming they walked with you without confusion, they sure as hell will drag you down a broken pavement and you’ll probably fall face-flat on the street.
In the summer, it’s too hot to walk them. In winter, it’s too cold to walk them
“Tab amasheek emta?”
Every meter, someone will stop you to pet your dog
I do admit, I’m guilty of screaming DOGGY when I see a cute dog walking and spend minutes, sometimes hours, petting the dog and not even look at the owner’s face or apologize. While I understand it’s not meant to be rude, it is pretty rude!
Endless dumb questions
“Da kalb lolo wala wolv?”
“Da kalb original wala me5alat?”
Want to mate?
No, this is not sexual harassment for me, but it is for the dog! Dog owners get randomly asked by other dog owners if they want to have their dogs make babies. But don’t worry, they’ll split the money in half when they sell the puppies!
People of the opposite gender think they’re being subtle when they ask you about Gezira Club
You’ll find other dog owners coming up and asking if you walk them in Gezira club. If you said yes, they’ll subtly ask when do you usually go and find it empty, and surprise surprise! You’ll find them the next time you go. Ya ma7asen el sodaf!
Random people screaming because your dog will attack them
The fact is, your dog does not give a crap about these random civilians. It’s funny because this mostly happens with small dogs. Like what can a chihuahua do? Bark in a high pitched voice till you die?
Men must have big dogs, and women must have tiny dogs!
If a guy is walking around with a Griffon or a Maltese, all hell will break loose; as if their masculinity is directly proportional to their dog’s breed. By the same token, if women have a big dog, they’ll be hearing some of the worst comments on the planet.
Stray animals are your worst enemies
I love cats, but let’s be real. Some street cats are so clingy and keep sniffing your dog, till your dog loses it. Then you have a Tom & Jerry situation that you have to deal with.
When your dog likes the ladies
You dog likes the ladies, and whenever he sees a woman passing, he’ll jump on her and start harassing her. You’re forced to explain yourself, and hope you die. This is particularly bad if you’re a guy.
The guilt you feel when the driver next to you bumps his car because he was staring at your dog
I only wanted to take my dog on a car ride, not cause the death of a complete stranger who was awkwardly staring at my dog!!