Girls will always be girls when a relationship ends. Some will cry, some will beg for a second chance, and others will try to fake strength then collapse. Others may actually go through all of these stages and nonetheless get nowhere. There’s no book to guide you through this, but there are a few pieces of advice I can give you.

Admit it!

Admit that it’s over and that you’ve done everything you could. People don’t end relationships or let go because of trifles; a series of unfortunate events take place before the climax. Admit that you’re hurt, that you need time to heal, and that you need some time by yourself. Cry, scream, smash things if you want to, but don’t ever think that this is the end of the world. Admit it’s not.

Don’t dwell on it!

Going over memories over and over again isn’t actually of much help to you. You’ll always fall into the dilemma of if/then, and it’s not good for you anyway because it’s over. Memories are melodramatic and tricky; tricky to the extent that you may actually think of going back and giving it another chance, which isn’t in your favour either.

Let go!

This too shall pass. It’s not easy, but the most painful phase is moving on and you have to do it; not only because you have to, but also because it’s good for you. Moving on isn’t easy, it needs patience and it needs work. It’s an important part of growing up. Take a few steps to move on and the big steps will come the more you push forward. Get busy with things you like. Don’t allow yourself to fall prey to memories. He might come back after a while, not because he loves you, but because he loves himself more! You’re the one whom he can manipulate and get to do whatever he likes till a new catch comes along. Stop this; once and for all!

Revenge!

Sounds like a good idea, ha! But what I actually mean here isn’t following your ex’s every move and new relationships; neither do I mean bad-mouthing him behind his back, or trying to find ways to know how he’s getting on with the new female in his life. Some girls do even worse; they make it their goal to get acquainted with the new catch and be her friend so as to keep themselves updated and give her the ‘best’ advice they can! That wouldn’t help you at all; it’ll even hurt you more deeply. Don’t fall into the trap of getting into a new relationship to hurt him or to forget him because that won’t do you any good! If you really want to avenge yourself, show him how strong and successful you are. Nothing would make his life feel more like hell! Men don’t like to feel that their exes are totally over them, that they are breaking free from their bondage to them, and that they are living their lives and doing the things they like.

Carpe diem!

You’re free for a while; make the best use of it. People envy you for that. Enjoy! Enjoy the music you like, the books you like, connect with your inner self, dance, contact your friends whom you neglected because your whole past life centered on your ex! Love yourself the way you are with all the faults and the mess. Create a life of your own, a life you deserve. “Be the kind of woman that when your feet
hit the floor each morning the devil says
‘Oh Crap, She’s up!’”