Chickens have nothing on us when it comes to crossing the streets! Crossing the streets of Cairo is a war. You have to have strategy, tactics, plan B, rescue plan, and a written final words in case you lose the war. Your thought process is known, and we all share it.
Stretchatak
You have to stretch and be physically fit before you start crossing the street.
Game Face: ON
You start preparing your “ana shaba7” face before you start crossing so drivers would take you seriously and let you pass. If you don’t have your game face, they’ll keep driving knowing that you’ll chicken out.
“Ana ha3ady!”
You now started crossing the street. The decision is made, and there’s no going back. You mentally play “Eye of the tiger” and wish for the best.
“I passed half the street, I think I could make it”
You’re half way there and it wasn’t so bad. Is it possible? You might actually cross the street without grim ripper dancing around you?
“I jinxed it!”
You now realize that you got way to0 excited, way too early. You’re starting to give up and accept death.
“LA2! ANA MSH HADAS MN 7OMAR!”
There’s always the 7omar on a kareta that comes out of nowhere and is about to literally walk on you. At this point, you’re not scared of death. You’re scared that people will remember you as the person who died from a donkey walking over them.
The a3ady wala ma3adeesh dance with the taxi
You’re trying to cross the street, and the taxi driver is trying to yesh2ot zabayen. They start walking really slow, so you think you could pass. Then they start driving fast when they realize you won’t get in. Then you stop walking. Then they think maybe you’ll want the taxi. So they slow again. This keeps going on for at least a minute or 2.
“Eh ya 3asal?”
You’re fighting for your life, then there’s this 50 something year old man in his middle age crises by3akes.
“Ana halef warga3”
You give up and think maybe crossing back is easier. Nope! It’s even worse. You realize you really are stuck!
“Did this car just fist bump me?”
A car just hit you, but it isn’t something serious. But you start panicking anyway. The driver will usually apologize, but you’ll never accept it w hya5od kol el shatayem.
“Ketab 7ayaty ya 3ainy”
Your life starts flashing right before your eyes. You start tearing up, and remembering all the bad things you’ve done in your life. You decide that if you live, you’ll be a better person. You’ll make up for all the sh*t you’ve done. Hakon ensan gedeed.
I MADE IT! I FINALLY MADE IT!
Congratulations!! You made it without dying.You’re immortal! You’re a “brince”!! You could do anything.
You realize you have to cross another street
Oh, crap….
