So, here’s the thing — no one is on good terms with their ex. Okay, that’s a stretch, 95% people aren’t on good terms with their exes and honestly, we can tell why.
Sometimes, relationships end in horrifying ways or it just doesn’t work out and there are no other issues except disappointment. This disappointment usually grows and snowballs into resentment.
Unless your ex realizes you’re a good person and apologizes, of course.
Yes, we’re aware you think this is something of a fairy tale but it isn’t. It’s just unlikely because it kind of means someone did a lot of self-reflecting and we know that almost never happens here.
Trying for closure isn’t a chance at a second trial in the relationship, in case you were wondering. It’s actually just a chance to finally flip the page and it shows a real emotional maturity, if anything else.
There’s one little thing you have to keep in mind, though.
Closure doesn’t mean any party has to apologize. Sure, it helps but it doesn’t mean someone has to feel compelled to say sorry or accept an apology they’re really not feeling.
It’s just a means to hear each other’s entire story so you both could finally understand what happened, how it felt, to move on.
Before you hurry up and start typing a risky text you’ll definitely regret, there’s a certain timing you have to keep in mind for closure.
There’s no bad time, per se, but generally speaking, don’t go around trying to talk to someone who’s still hurt or seriously angry about how you left things. That’ll be the worst kind of conversation, we know, and it won’t heal things.
Try for closure when it’s been some time for the other person to process what happened and let out the steam they needed to let out.
Try when you know that there will be a possibility for a conversation, which you can get a feel of through talking to a common friend or one of their friends.
If all the timing is right and you yourself feel ready, don’t hesitate and go for it. You don’t know how many times the other person has dwelt on something like this, how horrible they must feel, or if they’re capable of moving on sans closure or not.