In the Middle East, women grow up cherishing their virginity more than their own lives. The idea of keeping your virginity till marriage is usually forced; most of the time girls don’t even understand why they’re doing it. Parents rarely explain to their kids why they should be saving their virginity. When and if any explanation is given, the reason is often because it’s forbidden before marriage in Islam. Others choose to lie to their kids about it making them hate and fear sex, even after marriage.
Rebellious against many of the old traditional rules, the new generation no longer thinks virginity is so sacred. Not just that, but the concept isn’t really there anymore. It’s only about protecting your hymen now; everything else is fair play.
We hate to burst your bubble, but vaginal penetration isn’t the only form of sex. If you think you’re getting away with engaging in other sexual acts, like oral or even anal sex, and still consider yourself a virgin, then you might want to revisit your definition of virginity. If you consider female rape victims or other women who accidentally tore their hymens not virgins, then you probably need some serious sex education!
To clear the confusion – what is virginity; when and how can you lose it?
A virgin is a person, male or female, who never had sexual intercourse. What complicates the matter, however, is the elastic definition of “sexual intercourse”.
Siting Wikipedia, sexual intercourse is principally the insertion and thrusting of a male’s penis, usually when erect, into a female’s vagina for the purposes of sexual pleasure, reproduction, or both. This is also known as vaginal intercourse or vaginal sex.
Other forms of penetrative sexual intercourse include penetration of the anus by the penis (anal sex), penetration of the mouth by the penis or oral penetration of the female genitalia (oral sex), sexual penetration by the fingers (fingering), and penetration by use of a dildo.
Anal and oral sex are, therefore, types of sexual intercourse. If you practice them, you’re not a virgin anymore (sorry to be the ones to break it to you).
Now, with virginity defined; let’s head to the main questions – Why did we become hypocritical about our bodies and virginity?
A few articles back, we discussed“Should Women Be Honest About Their Past?”. The article rose a question or two about girls being honest with others, but not with themselves, about your sexual history. Some girls practice anal sex, which is religiously forbidden even after marriage, just so they could get away with claiming they’re still virgins. Worst part, they are truly convinced that they’re still virgins.
If you’re religiously fine with breaking the rules, and find it morally acceptable to have premarital sex, why do you keep lying about your virginity then?
We’re not in any way promoting premarital sex, nor expecting girls to publicize their sex lives. It’s about time you get honest with yourself; the sole beneficiary will be you.