You might think that us women suffer so much more than men when it comes to attending a wedding, with the preparations and all. We have to find the perfect dress, the perfect heels, decide on the most suitable hairstyle and hire the services of the best make-up artists to transform us into Cinderella for the night. And all guys have to do is just throw on the same tux they have stored in their closet for the past decade. But trust me they suffer so much more than you would care to think.
Here are 9 reasons why we should think twice before asking men to be our dates to weddings.
1. Suit Up!
As women, we love getting all dressed up and having makeovers just to go to someone’s cousin’s best friend’s wedding.. if that will mean we will be all glamorous just for a night, but ladies let us get one thing straight, guys don’t like to suit up. It’s just a fact of life. It takes too much effort and the ties are just too much work, so please stop complaining about how uncomfortable your 6 inch heels are!
2. Kilo Makeup
￼That make-up you spent an hour applying and then reapplying? Yeah, you and about half the other girls smeared it all over his suit while dancing or probably just saying hi.
3. Overbearing Mothers!
Don’t get me started on the greetings, that’s a nightmare in itself. Most of the mothers out there are scouting out the perfect gentleman they all think their daughter deserves, so guys are often ambushed with “howa enta ebn meen?” or “howa enta mortabet?” or the one I think both genders despise in this case “3obalak.”
4. Rumour Has It
Another reason most men don’t enjoy weddings is because of the unimaginable rumours spreading the next day. In his case all he did was ask a single woman to dance, but to most Egyptian women all it takes is a dance to either mean he wants to marry her and have her carry his children. If she’s not interested, it means he was coming on too strong even when she clearly declined him over and over again!
5. Let’s Boogie!
Let me just go back to the dancing part. Please if you can’t dance, just go back and sit next to your mother and wait for her to bring you the 3arosa. Some guys are just embarrassing themselves out there.
6. The Illusionist
On the other side of the spectrum, girls embarrass themselves after the wedding, when we go up to a guy we met once while we were all pampered and fully under the illusion of make-up and then they don’t recognize who we are when were in our natural habitat. Trust me, men aren’t the only liars here. We keep blaming them for everything when in fact their lies might be verbal while ours is all over our face, literally.
7. The Pressure
The one thing I can assure you that men hate when taking their girlfriends to weddings is the pressure she puts on him after. All of a sudden, she starts saying stuff like “howa e7na hanetgawez meta?” or “asl baba mish mewafa eni afdal mesa7ba keter lazem na5od step!” What happened to taking things slow?
8. Celebrations or Farewells?
Additional to relationship talk, men who go to weddings as part of the bride’s squad usually end up celebrating the end of their friendship with the newly wed rather than basking in her glory because we all know how most Egyptian husbands can be a little overboard with the jealousy.
9. Welcome to Hell!
Let us not even get started if you’re actually the groom… You slaved just to have this magical wedding for your beautiful wife (or so you thought) only to realize after the wedding that when you marry any Egyptian girl you’re actually marrying into her family, good luck with 7amatak!
Despite all that we all end up going to weddings, because what else can we do but celebrate and bask in our friends’ happiness and glory.