Growing up as an Egyptian male, there are subtle, unspoken aspects that I was able to notice in the texture of romantic relationships. One of these aspects is the usual presence of toxic masculinity: a set of behaviors that are irrational and destructive, stemming from beliefs that dictate the template of a real man.
This set of unspoken rules can tear men’s minds apart between doing the rationally correct actions and simply succumbing to an obsessive notion of trying to prove that they are the man!
What Are the Main Reasons behind Toxic Masculinity?
Psychologically, it can be attributed to peer pressure and insecurities. It’s no secret that we, human beings, tend to overdo things that we feel we’re lacking. And in most cases, men who resort to this may simply feel they need to prove that they are men. Skewered thought processes like this can lead a man to destroy his relationship whilst he battles imaginary monsters in his head.
How Toxic Masculinity Can Ruin Your Relationship?
Falling into the trap of this mindset can lead to irreparable damages to your loved ones. And though it’s programmed into our culture, it’s very important to make decisions based on rational and solid, healthy emotional reasons. Here’s how to identify this behavior:
Proving Something for No Particular Reason
When the argument makes no sense and has no beneficial purposes, it can be a sign for merely trying to exercise pseudo-dominance, fueled by the notion that “a man always knows better and should not be opposed.”
That’s why it’s very important to differentiate between arguments that will benefit the relationship and quarrels that are based on blind ego.
Stubbornly Refusing Improvement
Proper communication is the bread and butter of any healthy relationship. Refusing to hear an opinion or an idea, stubbornly, because you are a man and you have always been entitled that your word is the law is not healthy for communication. Some even use it as a trap card to end the “hassle”.
It’s important to keep one’s ego in check and understand that it’s okay to heed advice from people who love you.
Subconsciously Demeaning Your Loved One
The worst of them all! You will catch yourself jealous of your loved one’s success, hell-bent on making her acknowledge you as her better half. Her success may lead you to feel that your masculinity is threatened.
This harms your partner’s psychology, and eventually, will lead to destroying their psyche and the relationship.
One of the worst things a human being can feel is the denial of their affection. Some men can be aggressive in response to affection because of the concept that a man can’t show emotions or a mellow side.
By not acknowledging your partner’s feelings, you opt for rendering them irrelevant in a condescending manner rather than exhibiting any vulnerability. This is one of the most common abuses in the Middle East, as it’s very common among men to have troubles expressing their feelings; thus, they have trouble translating them as well.
It’s important to identify such behavior in your relationship and do your utmost to eradicate it, as this abuse is a ticking bomb that can destroy everything you care for. Keep communicating with your partner, keep improving, and be better.